How many times have you thought to meet someone halfway? I do that a lot with a good friend who lives 30 minutes from me. When we need to borrow from each other, we have a meeting spot that is 15 minutes for both of us. It’s wonderful and cuts down our drives.
Unfortunately, people apply this same logic to friendships and marriages. So often on social media there are memes talking about giving up on people who aren’t doing anything for you. It’s a constant game of contributing up to 50% and if the other party has not reciprocated, the relationship is off.
Bruce Hafen gave an example of 100% relationships as he shared an experience where his wife, a mother of seven children, was helping her 4th grade son complete his homework assignment. It was a diagram he was building on a cookie sheet, and it was taking forever. Hafen relates, “At first he fought her efforts, but by bedtime, I saw him lay ‘his’ diorama proudly on a counter. He started for his bed, then turned around, raced back across the room, and hugged his mother, grinning with his fourth-grade teeth. Later I asked Marie in complete awe, ‘How did you do it?’ She said, ‘I just made up my mind that I couldn’t leave him, no matter what.’ Then she added, ‘I didn’t know I had it in me.’”
So many relationships need a Marie involved, who won’t leave, “no matter what.” One formula for becoming more like Marie, involves understanding relationships the way the Lord has set them up. I remember years ago, I took an institute of religion class at Fresno State University. The instructor drew a pyramid on the board and talked of marriage and how there is the husband, the wife and God.
Bednar mentions this same model and has said, “Consider what happens in the relationship between the man and the woman as they individually and steadily ‘come unto Christ’ and strive to be ‘perfected in Him’ (Moro. 10:32). Because of and through the Redeemer, the man and the woman come closer together.” And as we read earlier, this pyramid can also apply to parents and children as well.
Can you imagine a world where individuals consistently gave 100% as they walked toward the Savior? What would relationships look like in such a circumstance? I believe these relationships already exist and are multiplying steadily. My hope is to remain in a covenant marriage where I can work with my husband as we grow together, closer to Christ.
-Mrs.
References:
Bruce C. Hafen, Covenant Marriage, Ensign, November 1996. (Click Here)
David A. Bednar, Marriage is Essential to His Eternal Plan, Ensign, June 2006. (Click Here)
Love and Marriage 